SHE PUT WHAT IN HIS BUTT?
ER: Hey, I've got someone that needs admission to the ICU for observation.
ICU: What is it?
ER: It's an odd story, but this guy arrives to the ER unresponsive. It's New Year's Eve so it could be damned near anything. It's the ER, let's be honest - it doesn't matter what day it is, people are f*cking crazy.
ICU: I can't wait.
ER: Wife says they were partying to celebrate New Year's Eve and that they were getting their kids back from CPS. Makes sense that you would buy a bunch of drugs, cool.
ER: Somewhere along the course of the festivities, husband passes out and doesn't wake up. She freaks out and calls EMS. He has good vitals and doesn't need to be intubated.
ICU: I'll take a look.
ICU goes to see patient and interview wife. During evaluation she says that they have been taking benzos, oxy, and drinking vodka. Probably top shelf because the other stuff can really give you bitch of a headache.
She can't get him to wake up, but she has a plan.
They just so happen to have some crystal meth on hand so she, with an ungloved finger, shoves some meth up his ass.
No idea if this woman had medical or pharmaceutical training and understood the absorption of drugs through the anus. One thing is for sure, she deserves recognition for thinking outside of the box.